It's all a little too surreal. You can say it all you want, you speak about it enough, but until it officially happens. You really do not know what to imagine or expect. On the daily I have individuals coming up to me or messaging me and asking me "what makes you want to go out to Iowa?" or "How are you ok with just picking and moving across the U.S. without knowing anyone?"
I make it seem a lot easier said than done but on the inside deep down of course there is a little voice inside me that is scared, nervous and uncertain. Sure I am a young, I do not have anything to lose, rather there is much more to gain in this situation than there is too lose. I'll be 100% honest, while leaving family behind will not be easy, missing out on all the little things my friends are doing, being able to go to a deli and know three people in the deli or run into old friends will be missed.
The one thing I tell myself every single day when that small void of doubt creeps into my mind is "what you are doing right now is going to pay off tenfold down the line." Sure it won't be easy, I will have to work tirelessly, make new friends, new connections, learn to live on my own, fend for myself, etc. But truth be told and this is something this generation needs a little more of.
Chaos, uncertainty and unfamiliarity. I am absolutely stoked to go out and start this new chapter in my life. Why? Because I embrace chaos, I embrace struggle, I love the uncertainty of not knowing what will happen next and I enjoy being uncomfortable. I hope for those individuals following along on my journey to Iowa as I embark on the road to start my career. That you learn one thing. Nothing will be handed to you, tough times will come, life is going to suck, you are going to be scared, you are going to be unsure at moments. But at the end of the day, you have tow choices when shit hits the fan. Answer back calmly, take that punch that life gave you, eat it and come back bigger and better or you can crumble, give up and start point fingers as to why you were not successful.
The reason I am so sure about what I am doing is because I am confident in myself and who I am. I graduated college with a BA in Fine Arts; Communications, by no means is that what I am doing. I completely went off the path that society pushes down our throat. Work a 9-5, desk job, stay home, save money, move out when you are ready, settle down, etc, sounds all fine and dandy but I'll stick to perusing my passion and doing what I know best. The reason I am totally sure this will be the best decision of my life is because I am not going to Iowa to make millions, collect a pension or anything like that. I am going there with the intent to give back, serve the hockey players in the community, help the youth there and be the coach/trainer I never had. Growing up I never had a great coach who believed in me or pushed me or really cared about me. I was never able to afford training in the off-season for hockey. I never was able to afford private lessons year round. Therefore to go this city of Ames and give back to this community and train the players off the ice, on the ice as well as coach. Means more to me than anything in the world. I am sure this is going to be the best four years of my life because I truly love what I am doing and I am passionate about the game of hockey and helping others in sports.
1,152 miles, 16 hours plus will separate me from my hometown, friends and family. It is going to suck, sure. Life is not meant to be easy, if you truly want something, believe in yourself and are passionate about anything. Say YES. Go out and do it. Do not let anyone or anything get in your way. You will find a way to make it, don't stop believing and always continue to find the light. It's there, just keep fighting. Let's go here!
And to all my friends and old friends, I do not say this to sound cliche. I truly do mean it, if there is anything, anyone needs please reach out to me, you need someone to talk to, help with training, etc I'll be more than happy to help. I wish the best for every and want everyone to live their best life and wake up happy every single day. I am grateful to be able to do that and I know how much it sucks when you are lost/misguided and have no one to speak to me. Don't be a stranger I am all ears and no judgement.